Omniscient First-Person’s Viewpoint - Chapter 16

Omniscient First-Person’s Viewpoint 

[Translator – aquamage]

[Proofreader – yukitokata]

 

Chapter 16 – The Enemy of Humanity Isn’t the Alarm, but the Morning Itself

The State had this funny saying.

The State’s research lab which undertook all of the world’s research. The bio-engineers who researched the human body and the material engineers who researched the properties of different materials used the same building. Because of that, they would sometimes accidentally go into each other’s labs without realizing that they were using the wrong lab until it was time to leave.

Actually, it’s really not that funny.

Rrrriiiiiiiiiing!

The painful sound pierced my eardrums. The fact that my ears were still fine after every morning meant that either my ears were more resilient than I thought or that the State’s engineers did a good job at making the alarms.

‘To bend without breaking.’ That was the State’s material engineers’ motto.

I wonder how much effort was put into just creating that one sound…

You know what, I don’t even want to think about it.

 

“Urgh, I hate that so much…”

 

Why? Why must that alarm greet me every morning? Why do I need to start every day with suffering?

I’m gonna lose my mind.

I yelled as I buried my face into the hard pillow.

 

“Someone please turn that fucking alarm off!”

“Woof!”

“Huh?”

 

‘I wasn’t expecting an answer, but who’s this?’

 

As I lifted my head after yelling some nonsense, I saw Azzy flying through the air. She jumped up in the blink of an eye, leaping off the wall. She then raised her front legs and struck the annoying alarm clock.

Crash!

I’ve said before that the alarm clock was like a steel cicada.

The steel cicada that harassed me every morning was trampled under the beast on all fours. The mechanical insides fly everywhere, and the thin plate responsible for the noise cried out for the last time before it was crumpled.

The alarm was pressed so flat against the wall that it had merged into it. In order to take it out, you would need to dig out the wall itself. The gears and metal pieces spread throughout the air. After doing her deed, Azzy came towards me. She wagged her tail, expecting a compliment.

 

“…What, you want a compliment?”

“Woof! Woof-woof!”

“Yeah, sure, you did well. You destroyed the evil alarm clock that harassed me every morning… To the point of no recovery.”

 

The core component was completely obliterated.

 

‘Unless there’s a smithy somewhere here, I don’t think it’s ever gonna recover.’

 

I combed my hair back before grabbing Azzy’s shoulders.

 

“But did you know, Azzy? The thing tormenting me every morning isn’t that alarm clock. That’s only a front. The suffering itself lies in the morning that tells the alarm to ring.”

“Woof?”

“Yeah, the real problem is the morning. The fucking morning that makes you repeat the day you just barely got through. I thank you for your virtuous deeds, but this doesn’t change anything.”

 

The first thing Azzy said after my long speech was:

 

“Dummy?”

“…?”

 

‘What did she say?’

 

I was standing with my mouth wide open, dumbstruck as Azzy looked up and continued.

 

“Can’t see sun. Dark here. No morning!”

“Well, no. Even if there is no sun, the morning still comes.”

“Woof! Can’t see sun, no morning!”

 

‘Saying that there’s no morning if there is no sun. I can’t tell if this is positivism or literal dog talk.’

 

“I sleep when tired! I like sleep!”

“Yeah, I also want to sleep whenever. But there’s work to be done, so it can’t be helped.”

“Woof? Work?”

“Stuff like cooking or cleaning. You know, if I don’t wake up in the morning, you’ll have no one to feed you.”

 

As I said that, Azzy’s ears flicked up. Then, she jumped onto the bed, bit my clothes, and pulled at it. My body was unwillingly dragged out of bed.

 

“No! Wake up! Food! Fooood!”

“Ok! I’ll feed you, so let go! Wait!”

 

Azzy ran all over the place as I made preparations. After pushing the broken bits of the alarm clock to the side with my foot, I wiped my face with a wet towel.

 

“Haaa… How am I gonna wake up tomorrow now that the alarm clock is broken?”

 

There’s a reason why I didn’t break the alarm clock myself even through all the suffering it put me through. If I don’t have it, I won’t be able to wake up.

It’s a sunless, roosterless abyss. A place separated from the world; one where time holds no meaning. As there’s no visible morning, there’s no way to tell the time. And it doesn’t help that the alarm clock—the only thing keeping time here—was destroyed by the dog.

 

“Is there anything remotely similar to an alarm…?”

 

I wanted to hit Azzy on her forehead, but I refrained and let out a sigh.

 

‘Well, she did do it out of consideration. Honestly, I did feel relieved when it broke.’

 

The hand that initially moved to hit her changed directions to scratch her chin instead. Azzy made a big smile and put her weight onto my hand.

 

‘How naively pure… There are absolutely no concerns in her face. I guess it’s only possible because she’s an ignorant animal. Although, these are the pros of a pet.’

 

I unsummoned my current Clothing Packet and pulled out a new one. The unsummoned Packet could be washed with the laundry or just with a tub of water. Electric pulses could make the clothes good as new, but you would need a special device for it. The former method would take longer to dry, but could be done anywhere.

After changing into new clothes, I let go of Azzy. As if she were attached to my hand by rubber, Azzy’s face followed my hand up for a short moment.

She opened her eyes wide, as if asking ‘Why did you stop?’ As if to tell me to keep going, she lunged her chin towards my hand.

It seems like she thinks I’m either a petting machine, a ball throwing machine, or a feeding machine.

Sigh.

Just my luck. Why am I being the dog’s babysitter?

Well, It can’t be helped. She’s our dog. The least I could do is feed her.

 

“Woof?”

“Let’s go and eat.”

“Woof!”

 

If there was a ‘World’s Goodest Dog’, it would be Azzy on her way to eat food. I went to the cafeteria with the dog who only became good three times a day.

 

‘I should get us the leftover bean stew for breakfast and have something else in the afternoon. Maybe I should cook. It’s been a while. Last time, to get Azzy’s favour, I stove-cooked some meat. But to be honest, meat is an ingredient that gives a better feeling of satisfaction when prepared differently… Huh? Why is the pot empty? I swear there were some leftovers in there.’

 

I turned my head. To my irritation, Azzy was looking at me as if she’d done nothing wrong.

I stand corrected. Azzy has never been a good dog. This mutt with superstrength is a disaster upon this world.

 

“Oi! You ate the last of the leftovers, didn’t you?!”

“Woof-woof? Woof!”

“Don’t play dumb! There’s no one else here who could have done it!”

“Woof!”

“You get nothing this morning! Nothiiiing!”

“Awoooooo!”

 

The wail of the starving dog rang out for a long time.

 

“Today’s lesson is about dealing with an ungrateful dog!”

“Woof!”

 

Azzy, who was lying down in the back of the classroom, barked loudly as if responding to what I said. When I stared at her with flaming eyes, she turned her head with a ‘Hmph.’

 

‘Hmph. You think I care?’

 

“Animals have never known grace and don’t even have the intelligence to recognize it in the first place, so there’s no need to do anything for them. You’re just suffering a loss! Just tell them to survive on their own!”

“Woof! Woof! Grrrrrr!”

 

The regressor—who had been watching me and Azzy go head to head—asked with no interest.

 

“What’s the problem?”

 

「It’s probably nothing as usual. I couldn’t care less, but I’ll pretend to ask.」

 

I could hear her impertinent thoughts, but I couldn’t let go of my feelings. I thumped my chest with my fist and responded.

 

“That fucking mutt ate all the leftover food from yesterday!”

“Bark! Grrr—Woof!”

 

Azzy barked, as if she was retaliating. She had the appearance of a human, but all that came out was the bark of an animal.

This is some real dog noise.

(TL/N: ‘Dog noise’ also means ‘nonsense’ or ‘bullshit’.)

Ugh, come on. If she wasn’t a dog with a dog’s mind, I would have easily read her mind and came through with unavoidable evidence. It’s at these times where not being able to properly read her mind is a problem.

However, the regressor asked, seemingly missing the point.

 

“So what if the dog eats some food?”

“‘Some’ food? ‘Some’?”

 

I pinched my forehead and let out a deep sigh.

 

“Seems like you’re missing something here, Trainee Shei. The only reason dogs and humans can coexist is the fact that it only takes some leftovers to feed these guys every day. And the amount a dog needs isn’t that much. However!”

 

I pointed my finger at the glutton and yelled.

 

“That thing eats not only the same food as me, but twice as much! And it has the audacity to eat on the same table!”

“Feeding her just a bit is fine isn’t it? Stop being so stingy.”

“Stingy? Stingy?”

 

‘You only say that ‘cause you have fucking everything from money to items after taking everything for yourself! How can you say that to someone like me who has to work every day just to get food on the table?! Didn’t you say something about Azzy being a piece of the end of the world?! Why aren’t you caring for her?! Isn’t that your responsibility as a regressor?! Why don’t you take ‘With great power comes great responsibility’ to heart?!’

 

I was about to say all that. But since I couldn’t reveal that I could read minds yet, all that came out of my mouth were plain old complaints.

 

“Then why don’t you feed her?!”

“Ah, sorry. That’s not possible.”

 

「I tried feeding her some food from the Bountiful Table… but she didn’t eat any of it. It’s overall plentiful, but each portion of food is so small that it would never be able to fill her.」

 

The thing that came up in the regressor’s mind—the Bountiful Table. Every meal, it would produce tons of food that could fill a table.

There were so many little portions of food that, with a lot of plates and some chopsticks, it would all disappear in an instant. It was designed so that each meal could provide a great variety of food to taste for a limited stomach.

It was the ultimate luxury item.

It was filled with the most high-end foods just to make sure no one mistook it for anything other than the Bountiful Table.

It definitely isn’t just some dog food, since it’s so precious that the dog can’t even eat it.

I wrinkled my forehead and let out a sigh.

 

“Anyway, I didn’t like eating on the same table as a dog. I’m going to leave it here. I won’t even pretend to see Azzy anymore. Class dismissed.”

[Wait. That’s the end?]

“Yes. I just wanted to share with you all my grievances. Now, you can have the rest of the day off. You won’t get every day off, so enjoy this time while you can.”

 

The one thing students love is a day off. The crazy thing is that even the teachers love rest days. Maybe the rest day is the world’s only greatest good.

After announcing the world’s greatest good, I quickly headed to the door.